This is a pretty embarrassing story … but I want to tell it because it might help you avoid a lot of emotional pain and expense.
Back when I was 22 years old, I had a huge crush on this woman. She’d moved to town a year prior and because she was a new pretty face, almost all the guys in my social circle were chasing after her.
She had a few brief relationships over the next few month. None of them were with me … but I kept hoping I’d get my chance.
Finally, when she was single, I asked her out.
She said yes. Then she mentioned there was some new restaurant she thought might be interesting to try.
It was about 35 miles away in the city. I thought it seemed like an fun way to spend the evening so we went.
The place was definitely trendy and upscale. When I opened the menu, I was shocked at the prices. I hadn’t planned on spending that much, but I really liked this girl and wanted to show her a good time.
After we finished, she suggested we go back to our hometown and have a few drinks at one of the local bars.
That sounded good to me–I was proud that I’d scored a date with this girl and I wanted to show her off a little.
So we arrived, she knocked back 3-4 drinks, then she spotted a guy we both knew …. and flirted with him RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME for the rest of the night.
Giggling … laughing … hugging him–all while holding the drink that I’d just bought for her.
I don’t think I’d ever been more hurt and angry. She wasn’t the least bit interested in me. She just wanted someone alongto pay for dinner and drinks until she ran into the guy she really wanted to be with.
I stormed out of the bar, grabbed a 12 pack from the local carryout and drank until I passed out … alone … at home.
Now most women aren’t like this … but there are enough– maybe 5-10% who will do you this way.
And you absolutely MUST protect yourself from them.
Being treated like that can scar you for years afterward. I know it did me. I felt so used and disrespected that my confidence was completely blown.
Here are the warning signs a woman is using you.
1. No suddenly turns into yes:
If you’ve been chasing a girl for months and she does a sudden reversal … look out. Odds are that her feelings haven’t really changed. What’s changed is that her plans fell through and she’d rather let you pay her way than stay at home alone.
One of the biggest clues is if she suddenly calls you late in the week and takes you up on an offer that she turned down a few days earlier.
2. She grabs control of the date:
When you ask a woman out and she accepts, she expects you to plan the evening. It’s all part of the excitement and fun.
If a girl suddenly veers from this tradition and starts pushing for very specific restaurants and bars, chances are she’s more interested in going to those places then she is in spending time with you.
It means you’re just a handy tool to pick up the tab while she enjoys a free evening at all her favorite places.
3. She introduces you as a friend:
This is a version of the old bait-and-switch. She’ll go out with you and let you pay for everything, then when you run into people you know, suddenly you’re just a couple of friends palling around.
You don’t buy your friends dinner and drinks all night–not unless you’re paying them back for helping you move to a new apartment or something.
If a woman lets you do this and then insists you’re friends, well she’s nothing more than garbage. Cut your night short immediately before you waste and more money on her.
4. She talks about how hot another guy is:
Some women love to drop how hot they think an actor or athlete is right in the middle of your date. And they do it to signal that you don’t measure up.
This isn’t teasing. She’s not challenging you. What she’s doing is discouraging you from making a move on her later.
But she’ll let you pay her way the rest of the night, of course.
5. Friends suddenly appear:
This is the worst sign of all–if this happens you know for sure that you’re being played
Users love pulling this trick. Here’s what they do. They’ll get you to commit to taking them somewhere (usually expensive), then show up at your door with a bunch of female friends.
Now you’re committed to the evening out … and you might even feel obligated to pay for everyone.
The other way they’ll play this is to have the friends suddenly show up in the middle of the date, destroying any chance you have of turning things romantic.
And this is deliberate, of course. The woman knows you’ll make a move sooner or later–she encouraged it by leading you on.
Now that you’ve blown a bunch of money on her, she’ll use her friends to block you from trying. No matter what you do, you’ll never find yourself alone with her. Her friends will ALWAYS be there.
Just as she planned.
Listen, if you ever figure out half way through a date that you’re being used, end the date immediately and save yourself further pain.
Don’t worry about being rude. Don’t even worry about getting the girl home. Simply leave her. Just get up and walk. Walk away and never talk to her again. To hell with her–she’s not even worth your anger. She’s trash.
And know this–you’re worth more than that. And you deserve better.
If you’re tired of dealing with users, mediocre women, and high maintenance bullshit … then what you really need is tostart attracting a different quality of woman.
Because let’s face it … what most of us want is a great woman for the long term.
Someone who brightens your day … encourages you … supports you …makes you a better man.
Scot McKay’s Deserve What You Want shows you exactly what you need to do to attract this kind of woman … and unlike in the dating scene … a lot of what you think might work DOESN’T.
What Scot knows–and what a lot of other gurus won’t tell–is that if you want an amazing woman you’re going to have to turn inward and work on yourself instead of focusing on pickup lines and gimmicks.
That’s a philosophy I hammer pretty hard in Stacking The Deck. Getting good at approaching girls and flirting is important–but it will only get you so far. The rest requires a good hard look at yourself. It takes two to tango, afterall.
So if you’re a little more relationship focused, I really encourage you to see what Scot’s all about with this product.